“Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who matter don’t mind and those that mind, don’t matter.” Dr Seuss
How you think and feel about yourself? Having self-love, self-belief and self-esteem are some of the most important things you can do for yourself. They may sound selfish or narcissistic, but actually having this self-confidence will help you be a better person, help others and make the world a better place to be.
Being able to build and maintain one’s self-esteem is important:
When you work toward building your self-confidence you will be able to stay calm and handle the difficult times better.
In their lives many people experience issues with self-esteem and self-confidence. Sometimes this may be for a short period, for others it can be a long term problem. Whatever your background, it is never too late to work on these issues. There has been a stage in my own life when things have been difficult, but I worked on any self-worth issues I have had from my past and keep myself calm every day. My life has now become simpler and building my self-esteem means that I am happier now.
Using my own personal experience and my years spent working as a clinical hypnotherapist cognitive behaviour therapist, I have developed a programme to help other people with self-confidence issues. Find out more about hypnotherapy for self-confidence here.
Here are 5 things you can do to boost yourself like I did:
“Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending”. Maria Robinson
These 5 things that you can do to boost self-confidence have done a wonderful job on my own self-esteem. If you need any help or support contact me on [email protected] or call me on 07967151790.
We all suffer from sleep deprivation at some time or the other. This can be due to air travel, anxiety, stress, medical issues or other interruptions in your sleep routine. Sleep problems can cause tiredness in your daily routine; and if it’s a regular occurrence and can lead to physical and mental issues.
This can manifest itself as weight gain, stress, memory problems, low mood, irregular blood pressure, loss of energy and a compromised immune system.
How do you know whether your insomnia is big problem, an annoying issue or medical problem? Read through the following list and see whether or not you do these things:
If any of the above answers are yes then you do suffer from a sleep disorder. We all have an internal clock that regulates our sleep patterns know as circadian rhythms. When it becomes dark our brain releases a hormone called melatonin that makes us feel sleepy and we go to sleep. But when it is light (a cue) in the daytime sends a message to our brain that its time to wake up influencing your circadian rhythms. These rhythms are linked to the sleeping problems, which when not in sync, can lead to anxiety, depression and winter blues or seasonal affective disorder.
What are the things you can do to get a good nights sleep, overcome sleep issues and learn to deal with them effectively:
By identifying the factors that could be affecting your sleep you can take steps to avoid them, or work on these issues. For example if you are feeling stressed you can try relaxation techniques, or you may want to get professional help such as clinical hypnosis with cognitive behaviour therapy to address the underlying issues that are causing your stressed state.
Things you can do for yourself to improve your sleep patterns:
If stress from work, family, relationships or your career or school is causing you sleepless nights, learning to cope with your stress, anxiety and maintain a calm, relaxed outlook that can help you get a good nights sleep is important.
If you think you could benefit from some professional help, take advantage of my free 30 minute consultation to discuss your options and get advice and strategies to sleep better at night.[bookly-form]
Most people go through life eating, working, socialising, without thinking much certain about how their actions affect their bodies. We may notice the effects our bad habits are having when we feel under the weather or have problems sleeping; but while we can make some connections between physical symptoms and our habits we are unaware of the real damage to our health and what to do about it.
Read on to see whether you recognise any of the problems and symptoms of these common things that can result in bad habits.
By eating a healthy diet, you can have a good effect on your body, brain and keep your weight under control. If you are eating a diet low in nutrients or foods that are bad for your body this can have long-term effects on your brain.
When you actively eat foods that damage your health, long-term your brain becomes exposed to cellular inflammation and this damages some cells that can cause development of diseases like Dementia and Alzheimer’s disease. Also food containing sugars and saturated fats like burgers, cakes and french fries can have detrimental effects on your brain. To stop this, you can start eating healthy foods: fruits, whole grains, fish and vegetables which are rich in antioxidants and these will fight damaging effects of inflammation.
Stress and anxiety such as relationship issues, work commitments, family problems and financial issues can cause you to develop habits that can damage your health. Some stress is good when working hard towards your goals, but excess stress can lead you to eat too much of the bad foods. Stress can trigger a sympathetic nervous response that makes your breathing quicken and heart breath faster releasing cortisol.
After you calm down your parasympathetic nervous response kicks in which leads to you to relax. Chronic stress can make you forget things and be more anxious and perform badly at work. You may revert to bad habits like smoking, overeating or drinking too much. When you feel tense and anxious there are deep relaxation techniques, yoga, mindfulness, meditation and visualisation techniques that can help you get in control of the overwhelm.
An active lifestyle can help you not only stay physically fit but also keeping organs like your heart and lungs functioning better and maintaining your optimal weight. Exercise can also help keep you mentally acute and helps your cognitive health too. Movement improves physical and mental health, releases endorphins and keeps you looking young and healthy.
Even just walking for about 20 minutes a day is positive for your brain and can improve your cognitive brain functioning. It will mean making better decisions with your food habits, help you keep focused despite the many distractions around and help with conflicts that may arise.
Sleep can also enhance your health and well being. If you struggle with your sleep patterns, you will wake up irritable, tired and not able to concentrate on your work or at your studies. Lack of sleep can interfere with your brain function and you may resort to bad habits, such as eating junk foods to give you energy to work.
If you know that you struggle with sleep then aim to eat healthy foods in the evening – not chocolate or biscuits at night – also avoid caffeine or drinking alcohol before you go to bed.
Define the goals and set a time limit that is realistic with what you want to achieve by kicking the bad habits. It can be hard and emotional, but persistence will make you succeed.
If you can acknowledge your bad habits, take active steps with commitment and tailor your attitudes to match them, you will make positive changes to the bad habits that can damage your health.
Try a few of these techniques:
Kicking bad habits takes a certain amount of willpower and a good understanding of how your mind works. You need to work with these mental patterns rather than fighting against them.
If you find it hard to make long-term changes to your bad habits, attitudes or behaviours clinical hypnosis with cognitive behaviour therapy can help. It can identify the issues and triggers that cause your bad habits, and make healthier suggestions that will help you improve your health and wellbeing.
Contact me for a chat about your individual situation – click here.
Whether No Smoking Day (8th March 2017) is the reason you want to quit smoking, or if you’ve just decided that now is the right time to stop smoking for good, finding the right smoking cessation method can be difficult.
Patches, gum, nicotine replacements and other methods can be successful for some people, but not for everyone. However, self-hypnosis is a great option – whether used alone or in combination with another smoking cessation method.
In this post I share why self-hypnosis is so successful, and also tips for practising it at home.
Most people believe that hypnosis is like stage hypnosis, it will make you ‘cluck like a chicken’ or ‘dance around the room’; but hypnosis is an evidence-based method and does not make you fall asleep or do things against your will. During a hypnosis session you will relax through visualisation and deep breathing exercises, and the hypnotherapist will guide you through the whole process. You will receive a piece a music that helps with the relaxation or a hypnosis CD. Suggestions given during the hypnosis session will help you change your feelings and thoughts; and the behaviour that follows. It will help you focus on your stop smoking goals by accepting the suggestions and preparing you for success.
Self-hypnosis can help you to concentrate and focus on your end goal to stop smoking for good by changing your habits and behaviours.
If you have found it difficult to gain control over your smoking habit in the past and respond well to suggestions, self-hypnosis will work well for you. Hypnosis relies on your belief that you can quit and you are ready to make the changes that is needed to quit. Your commitment to quit smoking and self-hypnosis will help you succeed with your goal.
The following self-hypnosis tips are best used after having had a professional hypnosis for smoking cessation session. If you would like to discuss your goals to stop smoking with me, please book a free 30 minute consultation here.
Some people can quit after one session with the clinical hypnotherapist while for others it can take six sessions for this to work. Every person has their own unique way that therapy works for them. By practicing self-hypnosis techniques you will be effective in gaining control of this habit that had plagued you for a long time. Keep your mind busy when you feel the strong urge to smoke, also eat healthy meals and drink plenty of water. Find an exercise class or an activity that you can keep busy with and try to avoid alcohol drinks that may make you go back to smoking again.
Self-hypnosis can be difficult to master and does not work for everyone, which is why a session with a clinical hypnotherapist can help you get started. The therapist may be able to uncover other underlying issues that are affecting your ability to stop smoking, for example stress and anxiety.
Quitting smoking with self-hypnosis as a stand-alone or as an adjunct therapy is an effective way to stop smoking. Self-hypnosis will help you to keep reinforcing the suggestions given in the sessions especially on the days that you feel the urge to smoke a cigarette. Remember that smoking is not a physical habit or behaviour, it is a mental problem and the way to achieve success with your quit smoking goal is through getting the help you need.
If you would like to discuss any of the above in more detail please get in touch with me. Call +44 (0)796 715 1790 or email [email protected]
Or you can get started straightaway by booking your free 30 minute consultation below.[bookly-form]
Personal development is a lifelong process of working on our individual qualities, behaviours and feelings to help us achieve our goals and live the life we desire. For some of us this is an easy process but for others, it is difficult to find what is ‘missing’ in our lives. We may find it difficult to recognise the patterns of habits and behaviours that stop us from achieving our goals.
Many of us have self-destructive behaviours that undermine our ability to achieve our goals. They are learnt over time and are often associated with negative thoughts about ourselves. They may make us feel low and unmotivated, they may represent that voice in your head saying, ‘I can’t do it.’
Personal development is important. It doesn’t have to be about progressing in your career or running a successful business; it can just as easily be about obtaining balance in your life, having healthy positive relationships, or having the strength to create a new life for yourself.
If you are struggling with personal development and want to break the cycle of negative thoughts that may be sabotaging your efforts, Cognitive Behaviour Therapy (CBT) and hypnosis is a great way to be focused and formulate your goals while changing negative thought patterns.
Generally, we all believe that achieving success in life is difficult, and failure is easy. Our language confirms this belief – we strive for success, we climb mountains, we believe that achieving our goals is a challenge.
If we already have this belief when we embark on personal development, is it any wonder that it feels so easy to fail?
Of course, some things are difficult. Quitting smoking, losing weight, breaking habits and behaviours that have become embedded over time. Failure can also become a habit, those self-destructive thoughts that say, ‘I will never quit smoking because I’m addicted’ or ‘I will never lose weight because I comfort eat.’
Therefore before we even give ourselves a chance at success, our subconscious is already doing its best to make us fail.
So if you are serious about personal development, you need to break the habits that set you up for failure, recognise when those behaviours are sabotaging your plans, and then focus on positive and achievable goals that will help you view success as easy.
This is where CBT with hypnosis can be a powerful tool to help change the way you think, feel, and behave. It can help you understand when those past negative thoughts and patterns are affecting you NOW, and teach you how to get rid of these feelings and focus on positive thoughts instead.
CBT and clinical hypnosis are highly effective at with personal development in the following key areas:
Clinical hypnosis programmes are tailored to suit the individual, their needs and goals, and the issues they are struggling with. It has been proven to help people remove the restraints that are holding them back and motivate them to find the success that they desire, and motivate them even further to live their life in a positive and constructive manner.
It is more than important in today’s world to learn more about yourself, know how your emotions work and manage them in everyday settings. Changeable times and rapid developing circumstances have created a cascade of emotional issues. There has been an increase in anxiety disorders, panic attacks, depression, anger issues and stress related problems. These emotional difficulties have made presenting psychological support and information the appropriate way very valuable.
Personal development is something all of us can embrace; just make sure that you provide yourself with the right conditions to make it a success.
If you would like to talk through your thoughts and feelings about personal development, book a free 30 minute consultation with me here.
Having self-belief, confidence and healthy self-esteem will help you take control of your relationships. By focusing on the value you place on yourself – which is your self-belief – you will boost your self-confidence in your relationships with other people and build strong bonds with them.
Your self-esteem is how to feel about yourself, your ‘positive regard’ and how much self-love you have. Your self-belief is influenced by how you think, feel and act. In other words, it comes from a sense of your beliefs about your identity and your stance in your world regardless of the expectations that you yourself or society puts on you.
Sometimes a woman’s self-esteem can be fragile. Women often compare themselves to other people and sometimes will change their behaviour to fit in accordingly. We live in a changeable world and many women feel they have to work really hard to fit into male-dominated environments. They feel they have to work hard to measure up.
A woman’s relationship with her partner can also be a vicious cycle, she may feel that she needs to conform her partner’s needs but this can lower her self-esteem and self-confidence. This also can weaken the bond she is trying to build with the partner. Instead of remaining true to her values and beliefs, she may focus on making her partner happy instead. And this distances her away from her own self-worth, self-belief and integrity, which lowers her self-confidence even more.
Here are a few questions you can ask yourself about your confidence in your relationship:
If you know that your self-belief, lack of confidence and self-esteem is damaging your relationships with other people, there is support available. Hypnosis is a powerful tool to address negative thoughts and behaviours and find the self-belief and confidence you need to take control of your relationships.
Contact me for a free consultation if you would like to discuss this in more detail.
The key to an honest and balanced relationship is for both remaining true to their own self-belief and integrity to build a strong and secure bond.
Key areas you can change to boost your self-confidence:
Self-confidence is an amazing quality to have that this can help create and build a wonderful, passionate, equal and loving relationship.
Working with people to help them build lost self-confidence or boost their low self-esteem is a passion of mine so please contact me if you would like some help.
Never let obstacles get in the way of loving relationships and enjoying your incredible life.
Did you make any New Year Resolutions this year? Lose weight, stop smoking, get a promotion or start your own business? Whatever your NY resolution is, you may now be feeling the pressure to start or stick with it…
You have tidied the house and all the Xmas decorations have been put away, but its end of January and you have not started using the gym membership or working through the things on your list. With February and March looming, you may feel like you’re struggling to keep up with the resolutions list, and it feels scary how far behind you are.
So did you make the right NY Resolution? If you made a life-changing resolution, a big plan to change direction or do something huge, it may be that the reason you’re now starting to panic is that you’ve taken too much on.
Setting small achievable goals, instead of a big goal that will overwhelm and frustrate you, can help you succeed in your personal life and business life. You also need to ensure that you have addressed those issues that could result in failure. For example, if you’ve tried to lose weight before, what went wrong and how can you improve your chances of success this time?
Often it comes down to confidence and self-belief. If these are already low it can be an uphill struggle to stick with and achieve your resolutions. Low self-confidence can sabotage your chances of success.
If this is an issue for you, consider addressing this first – hypnotherapy for confidence can help – and then with a boost to your self-belief you’ll be in much better shape to achieve those NY resolutions.
By taking small actionable steps and prioritising what is important to you, you will be more likely to stick with and succeed in your resolutions.
Here are some key points to remember to help you stick with your New Year resolutions:
Old habits and behaviours can be hard to change but they are often the key to successfully achieving your goals and resolutions. Once you understand why you respond to certain challenges or pressures in a particular way, it becomes easier to change your habits and behaviours.
Sometimes it can be as simple as changing the way you approach your resolution. Instead of saying, ‘I want to lose weight’ a resolution of ‘I’m going to eat more healthily’ can increase your chances of successfully losing the weight and keeping it off long-term.
Cognitive behaviour therapy with hypnosis is a highly effective way of identifying habits and behaviours that are sabotaging your chances of success, and then replace them with better responses that increase your motivation and drive.
If you’re struggling with your New Year Resolutions and would like to talk through ways of getting back on the programme, I offer a free 30-minute phone consultation for people in West Surrey / Hampshire. Book your appointment here.
Every year we make New Years Resolutions and every year by the end January we fail to keep up with them. For your New Years Resolutions to work you need to develop healthy habits, positive thoughts and improve your self-confidence.
Self-confidence is the key to making other NY Resolutions stick.
With great self-confidence, we will believe that we can achieve our goals whether that’s to stop smoking, lose weight, find a new job or run a marathon. Therefore before you set yourself a challenge that could easily result in a relapse, let’s look at improving your self-confidence first.
Relapsing is when your brain defaults to what you do normally – habits and behaviours – and says “oh well, never mind”. Unfortunately, setbacks like this can result in negative feelings and depression. So instead of setting ourselves up for a fall, if we address those deep rooted behaviours and habits first we can build our self-confidence and increase our chances of success.
Creating new behaviours and habits to substitute the old ways of thinking will help you take control of your New Years Resolutions.
If you want to explore a therapy to help you boost your self-confidence, hypnotherapy for confidence is a highly effective way to change negative habits and behaviours and thereby increase your chances of achieving all kinds of goals and resolutions.
Here are some self-reflective tips that can give your self-confidence a boost and help you understand how you can succeed with your new year’s goals. Write down your answers on a piece of paper:
Your brain has a way to re-inventing itself and those positive habits and behaviours you wrote down above can become the default response when you meet other challenges. Instead of relapsing into old habits and behaviours you can have the power and control!
Here are 7 steps for changing the way you think:
By focusing on actionable SMART goals and measuring them with the success you have achieved you will create a positive focus and a feedback loop. This will help motivate you to take the actionable steps week by week and create habits and behaviours long-term.
You will feel motivated, positive as you complete each step, and this will boost your confidence and self-esteem.
Understanding yourself will minimise your weaknesses and strengthen your resolve to stay focused and driven to daily enjoy your accomplishments. Finding a mentor or a therapist to help you to stay motivated, goal focused and on track can also improve your confidence and wellbeing.
An important thing to remember is to be patient with yourself, self-confidence and esteem is a step by step process and practice.
The difference between getting stressed and staying cool, calm and collected during the holidays is self-caring. With the Christmas upon us, presents to buy and wrap, dinners to cook, families to entertain, and the cold and flu season too, many of us feel so tired that we cannot enjoy the Christmas season like we should.
You feel tired from all the racing around, stressed with the endless ‘to do’ list and are exhausted mentally and physically. During this time stress-related visits to the GP’s increases, and by January you are ready to collapse in a heap and need another break from it all – but have to go back to work.
Instead of resigning yourself to feeling stressed at this time of year, how about practicing self-care and still get through your ‘to do’ list?
By looking after your wellbeing you will increase your energy levels, find it much easier to deal with all the stress that Christmas inadvertently throws at us, and also have time to look after others.
Here are some self-care tips to help you:
If you still feel like you need to do everything or there’s no time to fit it all in, think about how your stress levels will affect other people. Do your friends really want to spend time with someone who someone who is frazzled and can’t relax? Is it really that important to make your own mince pies if it means you stay up half the night and can’t keep your eyes open the following day?
By practicing self-care you will also ensure that everyone around you gets the benefit of the cool, calm and collected you! I’m sure they will all enjoy this version much more than the stressed one.
If you are struggling with stress, anxiety or overwhelm, hypnotherapy can help. Contact me for a free 30-minute consultation to explore more.
Christmas can be a stressful time of year for many people. It can put a strain on relationships, bring old grudges and problems to the fore, and also be a very sad and lonely time for some people.
With the expectation that you should be enjoying yourself with friends and family, the expense of gifts and nights out, and the huge amount of work it takes to create a wonderful Christmas for your nearest and dearest, it’s no wonder that many people feel overwhelmed.
For those people who are far from home, lost a loved one, or perhaps have separated in the past year, Christmas can trigger anxiety, stress and feelings of loneliness.
This is perfectly normal and understandable. If Christmas is making you feel depressed or stressed, this is not because you are a modern day Scrooge.
Due to the commercialism of Christmas, we’re all under a huge amount of pressure to make everything perfect. The Christmas card perfect family, a stack of presents under the tree, your home looking like a cover shoot for an interiors magazine, a table laden with home cooked Christmas food.
If we can’t meet these expectations it’s no wonder that many people feel depressed and stressed. And some people go into the process of self-reflection and thought about the shortages in life and compare themselves to other people. This brings added pressure and they spend a lot more than they should on presents etc. that they don’t have. This can spiral out of control and get them into debt.
Some people deal with loneliness at Christmas due to loss of a loved one, while some deal with family conflicts, as it is the one time that everyone gets together. It may also be your ‘first’ Christmas after a life-changing event – for example, divorce, the loss of a job, or illness.
These factors can all come to a head over the Christmas period. Below are some of the steps that you can take to manage your stress and your finances:
Some families struggle with getting on with one another and there is a lot of power play in the mix. Also, divorce among some of the family members means that unresolved conflicts can trigger stress and anxiety.
If you feel isolated if you have been recently divorced or a recent break-up, or have lost a loved one it can be really tough when everyone else appears to be having a good time. Here are some tips to cope:
Cognitive behaviour therapy helps to recognise behaviours that will contribute to anxiety and stress during the Xmas period. If you are already feeling panicky about Christmas and think that it’s going to be hard, you could get help now.
CBT can help you to think positively, recognise the triggers that can lead to stress and feelings of depression, and act before they overwhelm you.
If you are worried about how you will cope emotionally over Christmas, please do get in touch to explore whether CBT and hypnotherapy can help. Call 0796 715 1790 or email [email protected]